Sexy Deep Voiced Announcer: Welcome to the legendary literary land lead by the Lady herself, the one, the Only… Tiger Princess!
LOUD APPLAUSE FROM AUDIENCE AS THE TIGER PRINCESS STRUTS OUT TO “EYE OF THE TIGER” WITH A PAIR OF HANDSOME YOUNG MEN
Tiger Princess: Mr. Announcer, I do believe you are starting to repeat yourself!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Sexy Deep Voiced Announcer: I’ll ask the writer for some more opening lines for the next series then.
Tiger Princess: Good idea. TURNS TO FACE THE AUDIENCE. As Mr. Announcer said, this is the last show in this series of The World of the Tiger Princess presents.
AUDIENCE: “AWWWW!”
Tiger Princess: Well it’s nearly Christmas and I need some downtime with my family and friends… presents to open, food to eat, alcohol to drink, you know the score!
AUDIENCE CHEERS AND LAUGHS
Tiger Princess: The last Flash Story Showcase contest was a really tough one. I’d like to thank Renaissance Man Award winner, Gereg Jones Muller for his prompt.
AUDIENCE CHEERS
Tiger Princess: On to today’s guest star. This gentleman has won the Flash Story Showcase Contest twice. Once in the distinguished company of John Booth and Suzannah Burke, and again in November 2010, all by himself this time!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Tiger Princess: Please welcome the writer of “The Deed” – Paul Trembling!
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| Paul is the one on the right |
PAUL WALKS IN WITH TWO BLONDES WEARING RED VELVET BALL GOWNS TO THE THEME TUNE FROM MONTY PYTHON. THE YOUNG WOMEN LEAD HIM TO THE DAIS, WHERE THEY KISS HIM ON THE LEFT CHEEK BEFORE LEAVING THE STAGE. THE TIGER PRINCESS KISSES PAUL ON THE RIGHT CHEEK AND LEADS HIM TO THE CHAIRS WHERE THEY SIT DOWN.
Tiger Princess: Welcome to the show, Paul.
Paul: Thank you for having me here.
Tiger Princess: We’ll get straight on with the questions…
Paul: Fire away!
Tiger Princess: When, Where & Why did you start writing?
Paul: I was making up stories in my head before I even learned to write! And actually, I’ve never stopped – the number of stories I have in my head far exceeds the number I’ve written down!
Actually writing stories (as apposed to just day-dreaming!) probably started at school. To the frustration of my teachers! They’d ask the class to write a short story in one lesson – several weeks later I’d finally hand in my massive epic, complete with illustrations! Flash stories hadn’t been invented then!
As for why – I’d love to know! Perhaps because my Dad always read to me when I was little, and I never wanted the stories to end. (In my head, they never have). Perhaps because I’m basically dissatisfied with the real world, and want to live somewhere else!
Tiger Princess: How much writing do you do on a daily basis?
Paul: My writing schedule is too erratic to describe it as being ‘on a daily basis’! In between juggling my various other commitments – family, work, church, etc. – and a certain degree of natural laziness (which gets in the way of doing what I want to do, let alone what I ought to do!), the end result is that I don’t do as much as I’d like to do.
If something inspires me, though, I make time to write it! And as many writers will know, when you get in that perfect place where the story unfolds in front of you and the words just flow – then there’s no sense of time at all! (Of course, you still have to go back and edit the thing, which isn’t as much fun!).
Having a deadline is good for me. The FSS competition has been good for me, in that it provided both inspiration (thanks to everyone who set the prompts) and a deadline.
Still, it’s probably a good thing I’m not a professional writer. I doubt if I’d have the self discipline to stick with it.
Tiger Princess: If you could meet any writer (living or dead), who would it be and why?
Paul: This is a tough one, because there’s a great many candidates – and it would be good to be able to sit and talk to almost any writer, just to find out their perspective on things.
However, thinking about it, one writer I’d particularly like to have met is C. S. Lewis. Not only was he a brilliant fantasy and SF writer, he was one of the deepest and most original thinkers of his time. And, even more importantly, he could communicate his thinking effectively, which is a rare talent.
Though not his level intellectually, I’ve often felt in reading Lewis that I’ve made a connection with him, that we are on the same wavelength. It would have been nice to have found out if it’s true.
Tiger Princess: What is your favourite music to write to and why?
Paul: I don’t write to music. It’s a distraction, and when I’m writing, I don’t want distractions!
I tend to listen to music when I’m doing something else that doesn’t need 100% concentration. It used to be washing up, before we got a dishwasher! Now I mostly listen when I’m driving. Since I’ve got a 50 mile commute at present (each way!) that gives me plenty of time for listening, and I listen to a wide variety of music. I keep thinking that there must be some inspiration in there, but so far I’ve never developed a story from listening to music.
Tiger Princess: Just out of interest, why did you choose that piece of music as your theme tune?
Paul: I was thinking that my theme tune should be something grand and inspiring – the 1812 overture, perhaps, or maybe something from Handel. But I made the mistake of asking the family, and they said ‘the theme tune from Monty Python’ (i.e. Liberty Bell)! Well, that’s probably more me!
Tiger Princess: Which do you prefer – Paper & Ink or Computer & Keyboard and Why?
Paul: Definitely computer and keyboard! My handwriting is terrible – so bad that they gave me a laptop at work to do my reports on, as no one could read them otherwise!
Tiger Princess: And Finally – if you won the Booker Prize, how would you celebrate?
Paul: Hey – I won the FSS, who needs the Booker?!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Paul:To be honest, I’ve no idea how I’d celebrate. Such dizzy heights of literary stardom aren’t even on my horizon!
(And with sentences like that, they never will be!)
Tiger Princess: I hope you’ll be entering the new competition in January?
Paul: Wouldn’t miss it for the world!
TIGER PRINCESS TURNS TO AUDIENCE
Tiger Princess: Thank you to everyone who has ever entered the FSS Contest and answered my inane questions in this studio. The World of the Tiger Princess Presents... will return in January 2011 with a brand new contest and more guests to interrogate… I mean interview!
AUDIENCE CHEERS AND LAUGHS, THEN STANDS UP AND APPLAUDS.
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More stories and poetry from Paul Trembling can be found here -
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